My nature has been... that of an agitator. I am intellectually
fidgety. This nature extends to politics where I am perpetually
discontented by, frustrated with, or outright infuriated by existing
governmental power structures && authority. Well this has at least
predominantly been my nature.

Now the problem is... What if everything were good? If all I have ever
known... all I expect && think about is not conforming to power
structures... then I'm prone to continue that ill-advised course even
after things could be properly argued to be generally good... across-the-
board... like of course I can't always go against the grain but so for
the things I do... Am I right? Is it worthwhile?  I must decide those on
a case-by-case basis as well as I am able.  Maybe today there are many
offenders && the future will not be so... but the concern is that I am
in a recalcitrant rut.

Maybe my fundamental approach... to remain skeptical... an agitator...
critical, defensive && offensive... maybe those things are necessary
qualities to preserve... stabilize?... let alone approach excellence...
potential perfection... ideals. The key is decoupling analysis &&
criticism from disobedience. Maybe some things or many things warrant
revolt at present but ultimately... idealistically... even the dramatic,
stubborn, confrontational approach to challenging authority should have
limited purpose. It should be used with discretion rather than bandied
about like a drunken cowboy stumbling out of a saloon popping his 6-
shooter at the moon.

Strive to not be hypocritical. Aim your lens in on yourself && your own
process when you are able. Disobedience... disrespect of authority
regardless of proof of corruption... does not seem a worthy goal in &&
of itself... shit, it doesn't even appear responsible or rational from
the outside in many cases... but as a means to approaching personal,
communal, social, global improvement it appears there are myriad
deserving modern forums.

Don't just disobey to disobey.  Decide what with purpose.  This may be
unendingly challenging to you but recognizing that you abuse one of your
strengths in the name of good which may be to evil ends is important to
be aware of.

What brought this line of thinking on? (&& I guess also the motivation
to document the thought process?) Do I vote to support Prop 61? Make the
government bigger... increase state debt, taxes, programs, bureaucracy,
etc. but this measure appears to be clearcut in favor of child health.
Of course children's hospitals save kids lives daily && I love &&
respect that. Maybe tax dollars should go towards that but a government
that parasitically grows && festers && increases taxes with diminishing
accountability does not need to be borrowing more money or establishing
new programs or raising taxes. I feel like a monster for voting against
funding for children but it is done reluctantly on my staunch principle
that the overwhelming government is worse for everyone. I'm sorry to
children && their parents if my opinion were popular enough to harm them
but those issues (ie. the deserved attention && funding of children's
hospitals) need to be raised by a healthy government && society && I
don't see either of those ever arising on our current course.  By
diminishing the former is the only way I can fathom improving the both.